woah wo woaa ah... aah aaahhCCCHOOOOOOoooo.. eeoww goo on my hands.. wash room where where wash room.. ah aah aaahhCCHHHoooooo.. eeoww run run... ah wash basin water clean hands clear nose.. bliss... oh no, .ah.. here it ..aaah.... comes again AaaaHCCHHOOooo woah that was me? hehe canteen is still resounding... eeoww again.. gotta clean my hands.. and nose for that matter. but does it matter? lotsa gooey matter in mah nose.. need to cut off my nose.. hmmm wonder how surpanakha felt?? she wouldn't have had this problem for sure.. acchoo.. head splitting ache.. need some pills.. hmm what pills do i take? oh ok there.. green pills... fave colour.. obviously green pills mean peace... world peace.. wheee... (pop) hmm wonder what medicine it has? dunno waoh dizzy whoozy wheezy hmm.. slapping my head certainly doesn't make any sense.. mmm.. oh no .. ah aaah aaaahhh hmm.. nothing? that hurts.. all that for noth-- AAHCCCHOOOO... oh well.. by god and all his holy angels... if i live this week, that'd be, like, woah...

The 'J' factor

oh c'mon guys, this was gonna come sooner or later. for cross reference, one can always check up on raj's blog, dealing with the D factor. so what's with J now? yup, thou guess't it right. another invisible sphere that differentiates the haves from the havenots. and what is it the haves have or the havenots haven't? it's a decent Job. believe me when i say there are times when it is just too damn difficult to even lift up my head while walking in the corridors. there's that invisible J halo around everyone else's sniggering face. and it really takes a lot to step up and congratulate those who have landed a coveted career when i'm still seething behind my mask of accepted-failure, especially when i think that i am much more worthy of especially that coveted thing than the congratulatee. but of course, whenever did what-i-think-of-myself matter anyway? walking along the edges of the corridors, trying best to avoid everyone's sypathetic gaze, ducking into corners to actually evade individuals... oh my frigging god! i'm a convicted criminal already! noooooo somebody bail me out!!! oh and incidentally, i think the usage of 'bail' is the same in either bailed out of prison, or bailing somebody out of a sinking ship...

neways, so getting back to my original lament, i think all the geniuses of this world have contrived to come up with a most ingenious plan to compel me to undertake Mortification of the Body.. by actually suggesting that i needed a tie. coz u see, same dress, same tests, same results for a week. would adding a tie alter the result? gonna find out 2moro. so my advice to all jobless loafers out there. don't change your dress for teh next interview, just put on a tie. and for cripe's sake let nature take it's toll on that facial hair. no need to hinder the natural growth process of a patch of hair.. you wouldn't be able to find them anyway in a few years.. so let them flourish while they can.. unless ofcourse, it hinders your eating habits. by which time you should have changed your eating habits... speaking of eating habits, this quasi-intellectual needs to stuff some stuff somewhere, so so long..

Life is just a huge real time MMO-RPG

Glory be to thee, O proud runner,
and since i'm not a good punner
i'll stop writing such shit
that your eyes don't see fit
to sit beside so many a stunner...

idiotic and stupid as it sounds, this was inspired by my blog being accepted into the da-iict's rss feed (i'll leave finding out the connection for you, i'm not that stupid :P) and as for akshat, i appreciate this gesture, but i'll feel better only after i've seen some of those elusive comics!!!

at this juncture, when all the world is busy fighting their lives for their future, i take a moment to bring to your notice, that the future is but fickle, and lost souls like myself shouldn't be feeling too sad, just bad. or not. for where in lies the adventure, if the next five years become predictable? where will your spirit soar, if it is fettered by shackles of bonded labour? anyways like i said, souls like myself feel a need to justify their complete uselessness somehow, so we pretend to not notice what's going in the real world, and tend to slip into our very own world. where kalimdor is at war with azeroth, and character files tend to get corrupted. but a better world (mmo/rpg, that is) would be where every CJ can choose his own Kendl, and still go to war with the ballas fools. or where Sweet is really your brother, and not just a useless bot. idea courtesy the original thinker, a.k.a. g.o0o.se. or maybe where the ballas fools had the help of orcs, and humans had to side with grove street as their only hope. hmm. got to work out the details. and oh, btw, did i mention that people in my world tend to lose touch with your world to the extent that they don't care about their future? no? not that they really do care at all...

been too much outta touch, so get back ta ya l8r...

The moonglade is lovely, dark and deep,
But i have quests to complete,
And blogs to read before i sleep,
And blogs to read before i sleep.

searching for a better thing to do while i while away my time in the hope of an all-out night out, i start blogging. but since i'ev got no topic in mind, and too lazy to do any thinking, here's a list off the top of my mind...

some things i like:

words like pleonasm (don't confuse with neoplasm) and adventitious
that i come across in friends' blogs (which incidentally make me look up dictionaries)
Amul ka Rs.5 wala chaas packet.
jeans, faded or torn by natural usage, not artificially altered.
recieving calls from long-lost friends, especially female.
wind blowing in my face, like right now, where i'm sitting beside a window.
raj's pc, coz there's always something interesting.
my roomy's attitude toward life.
frogs croaking and crickets chirping under a full moon lit night.
MD PC and his antics, especially on tours :D.
Volvo buses and reclining seats.
cute chicks in pink and blue furry lingerie.
nightly walks on lonely roads, especially with ones whom i can talk freely.
a dinner wholly on chawal and homemade achar.
my friends and my batchmates, their quirkinesses and solidarity.
keyboards that have non-sticky keys and heavy bases (like andy has right now).
not having to switch off the lights when other ppl are sleeping in the room.

things i don't like:

getting up early in the morning to attend shitty GRE classes, taken by Neeru, especially if its AWA.
loud music from movva's room, especially when i'm trying to sleep.
lalla trying to throw his weight around.
ppl who have reservations against me watching naruto manga.
security guards who force you to quit lab, even if it's before closing time.
having to sms out-stationed friends, rather than call, since they are on roaming.
ppl who say they will reply but never do, to your mails.
me.
videos and movies trying to pass off uncensored material as "demanding by the plot" rather than accepting it's pure porno sleaze.
misunderstandings, especially the ones caused because i really can't articulate my thoughts and feelings.
having to be a parasite on other's comps, coz i don't have the face to ask my parents buy me one.
excessive usage of first person reflexive pronouns (i, me, my, ..) in my writings.
that urge to have a puff whenever i see ppl smoking.


cya guys.

I can still feel you, o Wind
The fleeting glances
The nightly sojourns
from a caring touch
to a loving embrace

I can still see you, o Wind
rushing past, looking back
filling me up to let me dry
lolling around in the gardens
flying around the whole world

I can still recall, o Wind
those private moments
from atop the hills of Vizag
to the jain temples of Abu
moments that i cherish even now

I do remember you, o Wind
at times so angry
to knock me down
at times so willing
to hold me up

under different skies, i met You
dawn-fresh red and lazy noon white
young nightly black and cool evenin'blue
in the grounds of a Ba'hai temple
and again in the resorts at Munnar

But do I know you, o Wind
do you really see me?
faceless yet facing me
pointless yet pointing away from me
what is thy will, o heavenly Wind?

life, goals, passions and NFS-U2

the other day i was speaking to a very dear friend of mine, who's going through very tough times btw, and i had to tell him that i really do not have any passions. come to think of it, it's a very disturbing thought. imagine a life where all that a person wants to do is nothing. what is the use of such a life? what's the purpose of living like that? i know i have to change, i know i have to find something to do in life, i know i have to do a lot many things. but like he tells me, knowing that you have to do something, and having the conviction and the motivation to follow it through to completion, are very very different things. people have always told me knowing your errors is halfway to correcting them. how wrong they are. i've known all my errors even before committing them, but that never prevented me from going and doing them anyway. one really would not understand such a kind of thought processes in a 20-odd-yr-old, who's supposed to be mature enough to start his own life, but naah that's not me.

so okay, i might not have those strong passions, i may not have burning desires to achieve the highest of goals, but i mean, i got to have something to do. so i start thinking as to what do i want to do right now. trying to push away the most obvious answer glaring in one's face is quite difficult, especially if that answer was "nothing". nyways, so i sit down and say to myself, lets try and complete NFS-U, all the 111 races. so okay, i'm cruising along in my career, and suddenly the inevitable happens. i lose interest. except for the thought that i've got to complete the race, nothing makes me even want to steer the car. and predictably, it takes me umpteen number of restarts to finally make the first place. seeing the number of restarts it takes, the interest meter further lowers its pointer. so i realise that i'm too lazy to complete anything that i'll ever start. be it football, be it gym, be it sketching or solving crossword puzzles. is this what'll become of me? can't i ever find one blinding passion to rule my thoughts, desires and life? will all that i may ever achieve be the same as the next door neighbour or even less?

it's allright to say that every one's born for a purpose, but i tell you, getting to even know one's purpose might eventually take the life out of one. then what is the purpose of even living, when you've got to spend your whole life finding your purpose? twisted logic, lateral thinking, no that's not gonna help. these are not some math logic problems that akshat can solve in seconds, these are apparently questions of/in life. somebody help me here.

It's about time too

Exams are over. waiting for re - exams. waiting for results before that. nothing to do now, really. too lazy to play football. too tired even to go out for the second meal in a day. apparently farewell to seniors today, like i give a tiny snail's arse(especially with shaan not around). A in MLA. good news. MCS marks in two days. bad news. Algo results anywhere anytime very bad news. shitty RI. bad news. 3 months to do nothing. good news. parents calling from home. bad news. blogger all day long. good. me too boring for you. guess what? ya exactly. bad news. my brain too numb to process anything intellectually more exacting than a snail's progressive path finding and straight-line-path obstace detection/avoidance mechanisms. what's with my obsession with snail's anyway? too bad can't find any on this campus, coz it's FRIGGIN HOT!! bad news. hint of a drizzle earlier this evening. good news. infact very good news, the whole evening spent facing the wind. i guess i'm still a toddler sucking his thumb. i hold on to the li'l pleasures in life to go on living the next moment through. like the A in mla. gotta keep thinking about it to sustain my mood. or the assumed-but-not-so-apparent intellectual superiority over the 'lower mortals'. man, why am i so dark! no manjeet, (you d******k) i'm not talking about my complexion, i'm talking about my outlook towards everything. probably the wrong influence at the wrong time. probably just born too pessimistic. probably (more than probably, actually) too lazy to start a whole new paradigm shift in my views and outlook and opinions. but never too lazy to keep on blabbering bullshit about myself. oh c'mon guys, it's not like you've never expected this.

gotta start a diary, but then again, too lazy. but probably worth the time. in the future, for ppl to know why such a "wonderful smart little boy" went the way he did, whichever way he did go. then again, who am i kidding. who'd be interested in the life and times of a loser-wimp-whiner gone ballistic on the rooftop of a 4 storied academic building? oh shit! i've been blogging in my sleep again....